Wow!!!!

O.k. so how do I keep my excitement under control????
Things have just been happening in a way that only God could be controlling it. Where do I start? So Mike has had, from the beginning of the thought of the g-tube, a gut feeling that it is not meant to be. He has been trying to figure out what it is exactly. Then we were supposed to have surgery Friday. It was scheduled and everything was set to go as far as having that reserved for us. Then the nurse said something to the surgeon and he had no clue that he was supposed to do that and he said I have a full schedule on Friday and I don't want to do surgery at night and he is taking his daughter to college that night and will be gone for 2 weeks. So there is that. The schedule now moved the surgery to Tuesday. Then I get this gut wrenching feeling that her reflux has to be playing a part in it. So I discuss with the doctors all my observations with her and her behavior, etc. They said we could try the zantac. Yesterday at 2:30 p.m. was her first dose. She did well during the night. I was there at rounds today and we talked about trying to nipple her today...but my gut didn't feel great about it. Thankfully, the doctor and nurse spoke before I did and just said let's give her one more day based on the fact that zantac usually takes 24 hours. If this was my one chance I wanted to give her a good shot and I thought one more day of the medicine would help. So that was that and I felt really good about it. Emma has been on 1/2 liter of oxygen and they said they wanted to try and get her down to a 1/4 liter before the surgery. Well, they tried and she was satting in the 80's so they had to keep her at a 1/2. They want to see her in the 90's. Well, I called in to talk to the nurse tonight and see how Emma is doing. She said, "Bethany, that zantac must be working because her throat seems to be less swollen. She is breathing better and her oxygen is down to 1/4 liter." Praise the Lord!!!! All her "symptoms" seem to be better. Less grouchy, respiration is down, etc. Yes, I'm trying to be reserved but I'm also excited.
So here is the other thing. I found a bottle that I know will work without having her work hard. This might be sad, but Olivia is my ginny pig. She takes thickened formula with rice cereal anyway. So I gave her the dosage that Emma would take and she took it in less time than her bottle (I usually don't make Olivia's as thick). I know this will work. There again I don't want to be to sure, but I'm sure. I know I'm not making any sense. So here again I will be in rounds tomorrow and propose my idea with the bottle. I feel like I have a great background given that I have experience with feeding a child with a cleft lip and palate. I have used the pigeon, haberman, and syringe nipples/bottles. This is not one of them but it has a vacuum that will take away the extra effort needed to eat the thickened formula. I have seen them before but my mother-in-law mentioned that it helped her feed her daughters (twins) when time was tight. So...I was in Walgreen's a while back buying something for Loren in a hurry (I think we lost her only pacifier) and I saw the bottles and I remembered what Linda had said. I thought I should just get them later. Then I was like nope let's just get them now. Won't hurt. So today, months later, I was reorganizing some things when I saw them. Then the thought occurred and so on and so on. Well, Mike and I have decided that we will not have the surgery unless these fail and I just really believe they won't. So there is my long-winded blog. I hope I can sleep tonight. If they let me use it tomorrow, I will be in there for every feed. I need to know that it is being used correctly and she has a fair shot. I will even stay the night. We are so close!
Please pray for continued improvement for Emma. Please pray that I will be allowed to try this bottle tomorrow. This is truely a miracle!!!! All things come together for good!!!
Love you all,
Thank you for all the support, prayers, concerns, questions and love. You make it possible to have this journey.
Good night!
Bethany